There are lots of things I can’t do. I don’t get to drink, I don’t get to miss sleep…I’ve had to make big decisions about my life.

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 16.7.2020 Jo’s 17th vlog is out now!  Jo speaks about having difficulty sleeping at the moment, which is a big warning sign for her. She also reflects on all the things she has to do just to stay well and the big decisions she’s had to take in life to stay well. She’sContinue reading “There are lots of things I can’t do. I don’t get to drink, I don’t get to miss sleep…I’ve had to make big decisions about my life.”

The trigger for a lot of my difficulties in the Coronavirus crisis has been the feeling of the unknown, which hasn’t been helped by the lack of leadership from the government.

Sunitha’s #MadCovidDiaries 7.7.2020  What a difference two weeks make? In the last ten days, it’s been a rollercoaster of unexpected life events, which has left me feeling both super hopeful and super anxious. The most prominent item is that I am now getting paid for some work that I was previously doing as voluntary. It’llContinue reading “The trigger for a lot of my difficulties in the Coronavirus crisis has been the feeling of the unknown, which hasn’t been helped by the lack of leadership from the government.”

The #MadCovidFund is nearly at 20K!

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 29.6.2020 Jo’s 15th vlog is out now!  Jo reflects on her friendships and relationships with others, as someone who is in a long-term relationship. She gives us an update about the #MadCovidFund which is nearly at 20K! If you’ve enjoyed this vlog, please consider donating to our Hardship Fund for people with aContinue reading “The #MadCovidFund is nearly at 20K!”

Since lockdown began, my bright, carefree, sociable girl has had her life turned upside down. Her bedroom is her classroom; her schoolwork set online.

Lucy’s #MadCovidDiaries 25.6.2020  She’s not a talker, my nine-year-old daughter. Not about her feelings, anyway. Even when she was in Reception, her teacher commented on how she never cried. ‘Sometimes I can see she really wants to,’ she said, ‘but she won’t let herself.’ She’s like me in that respect. I grew up keeping myContinue reading “Since lockdown began, my bright, carefree, sociable girl has had her life turned upside down. Her bedroom is her classroom; her schoolwork set online.”

Identifying with, and belonging to groups is important to me

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 22.6.2020 Jo’s 14th vlog is out now!  If you’ve enjoyed this vlog, please consider donating to our Hardship Fund for people with a mental health condition who are in financial need during COVID19. Mad Covid is an entirely unfunded group. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. WeContinue reading “Identifying with, and belonging to groups is important to me”

If they kick me out of services, so be it, but I’m done with therapy – especially Covid-friendly Zoom therapy.

Lucy‘s #MadCovidDiaries 18.6.2020  TW: Self harm Therapy in the time of Covid Throughout the years I’ve been under mental health services, I’ve been through many courses of therapy. None of them have proven particularly helpful, and nor did I expect them to. I firmly believe that my mental illness is down to screwy brain chemicalsContinue reading “If they kick me out of services, so be it, but I’m done with therapy – especially Covid-friendly Zoom therapy.”

I really miss hugging people

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 15.6.2020 Jo’s 13th vlog is out now!  Jo reflects on the previous week which has been difficult. She talks about her friend who has recently died and the emotional labour that goes into Zoom and Skype meetings. Jo misses her family and friend and her dog in particular! Jo did another diary entryContinue reading “I really miss hugging people”

It’s been an intense couple of weeks in the context of world events.

Sunitha’s #MadCovidDiaries 15.6.2020  It’s been an intense couple of weeks in the context of world events. It almost feels like it doesn’t feel as important to focus on Covid with the current events happening. Discussing what’s been happening in my life the last few weeks has also seemed unimportant given the situation in the USContinue reading “It’s been an intense couple of weeks in the context of world events.”

You have never acknowledged or apologised for the harm you caused me.

  Ellie‘s #MadCovidDiaries #Midnight Waffles 15.6.2020 It’s hard to know where to start. I guess as good a place as any is to admit quarantine has not been easy. For the last month or so I’ve felt unable to articulate what I’m thinking or feeling, to myself as much as anyone else. I’ve felt unsettled, I can’tContinue reading “You have never acknowledged or apologised for the harm you caused me.”

Rather than lockdown, we’re in limbo

Lucy’s #MadCovidDiaries 10.6.2020  @lucywriter As Covid-19 restrictions slowly ease, I find myself wondering whether we’re still in lockdown. In some ways, it no longer feels like lockdown now I can see my friends and family (albeit at a 2m distance and not on a rainy day unless we’re willing to get drenched in the park),Continue reading “Rather than lockdown, we’re in limbo”

You’re not a Mental Health Activist in any sense if you’re not intersectional

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 8.6.2020 Jo’s 12th vlog is out now!  If you’ve enjoyed this vlog, please consider donating to our Hardship Fund for people with a mental health condition who are in financial need during COVID19. Mad Covid is an entirely unfunded group. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. WeContinue reading “You’re not a Mental Health Activist in any sense if you’re not intersectional”

We need to amplify black voices right now

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 1.6.2020 Jo’s 11th vlog is out now!  Jo reflects on the international events of last week and hopes that this might spark a change. She highlights the importance of amplifying black voices during this time. If you’ve enjoyed this vlog, please consider donating to our Hardship Fund for people with a mental healthContinue reading “We need to amplify black voices right now”

I’ve been a mad person in psychiatric services for 15 years and have spent 12 years on Lithium, which means I’m in the lost causes league.

Heather‘s #MadCovidDiaries 27.5.2020  Moonstruck. I’m showing my fellow volunteers how Zoom works. We click through the menu above our faces and I explain that you can rename yourself. ‘You could have a nickname, or choose your pronouns, or make up a whole other name, if you like.’ I spend the rest of the session teachingContinue reading “I’ve been a mad person in psychiatric services for 15 years and have spent 12 years on Lithium, which means I’m in the lost causes league.”

#MentalHealthAwarenessWeek2020 – We are already aware!

This is a reblog from Charlie Richards‘ blog Recolourising Life This last Sunday (24/05) marks the end of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week. I have quite mixed views about MHAW for various reasons, but my opinion can best be summarised as: We need to be encouraging action, not awareness. We are already aware. When I say we areContinue reading “#MentalHealthAwarenessWeek2020 – We are already aware!”

My therapist held this power over me and yet could affirm that the experience I was having was not diseased or pathological, and was in fact positive, was remarkable and deeply validating and healing for me.

David Mordecai’s #MadCovidDiaries diary – 27.05.2020 One of memories that clearly marks how my life changed thanks to mental illness was being admitted to the overnight unit at the health centre of my university and having the staff person there write a giant ‘psi’ on her pad, which she then showed to the friend whoContinue reading “My therapist held this power over me and yet could affirm that the experience I was having was not diseased or pathological, and was in fact positive, was remarkable and deeply validating and healing for me.”

No one can fix this mess… Maybe it’s reasonable to cry… Maybe being one of many helpline callers tonight is a sign that this crisis is a big one.

TW: Self Harm Heather‘s #MadCovidDiaries 27.5.2020  I’ve been crying for an hour by the time I make the call. People say crying is therapeutic, like a flash storm – it’s a sudden spurt of emotion that clears all the cobwebs away. I’ve been sat, fully dressed in the empty bath tub alone for an hourContinue reading “No one can fix this mess… Maybe it’s reasonable to cry… Maybe being one of many helpline callers tonight is a sign that this crisis is a big one.”

This whole experience is really taking a mental and physical toll on my body. Each day to me actually represents three or four days of pre-covid time.

Sunitha’s #MadCovidDiaries 25.5.2020  Yesterday, my mum reiterated her desire to come drive to see me even if it was just from afar. A couple of weeks ago, I was seriously considering self isolating in preparation for relaxing of lockdown rules and asking my parents to do the same. Unfortunately, trying to convince my mum thatContinue reading “This whole experience is really taking a mental and physical toll on my body. Each day to me actually represents three or four days of pre-covid time.”

I’m amazed at the brass neck on Johnson. It’s like being in some George Orwell novel.

Jo’s #MadCovidDiaries 25.5.2020 TW: Swearing. Jo’s tenth vlog is out now!  Jo is not happy about Dominic Cummings’ antics in Durham when he should have been adhering to the lockdown and then using Autism as a defence. She’s also not happy with the way Boris Johnson has stood by him. On a positive note, she’sContinue reading “I’m amazed at the brass neck on Johnson. It’s like being in some George Orwell novel.”

This pandemic is killing us for different reasons.

Lucy‘s #MadCovidDiaries 24.5.2020  TW: Self harm, suicide and thoughts of suicide are discussed throughout. ‘This pandemic is killing us for different reasons.’ Is it Week 8 of lockdown? Week 9? I don’t even know any more. All the days are blurring into one, all as bleak as each other. Life may be the same, theContinue reading “This pandemic is killing us for different reasons.”

Self harm is something many living with mental illness have experienced, and yet it remains something people are squeamish about, that they reject, that they shame us for.

Hope’s #MadCovidDiaries Tuesday 21.5.2020 TW: Self Harm Because it’s been the heinously platitudinous Mental Health Awareness Week this week, and inspired by @mugamnesty’s recent blog on psychosis, I’ve decided to write this diary about self harm. Self harm is something many living with mental illness have experienced, and yet it remains something people are squeamishContinue reading “Self harm is something many living with mental illness have experienced, and yet it remains something people are squeamish about, that they reject, that they shame us for.”